


Just the Way You Are

by CloudHop



Series: pick me (nayana) [11]
Category: Produce 101 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sick Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-03-25 21:20:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13843260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloudHop/pseuds/CloudHop
Summary: sinking into the darkest night-BoAgunhee has secrets and his friends have no patience.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is something i've been planning for a loooong time. please...stick it out for me.

“No Minki, I will not run that sto-”

“Hwanwoong! Respect!”

Hwanwoong runs a hand through his hair and bites at his lip. “Minki- _hyung_. I refuse to edit that story. I can’t even believe you made _Eunki-hyung_ take photos…”

Eunki shifts awkwardly. Minki’s glare is ice cold.

“I don’t pay you to hear your opinions Hwanwoong. I pay you to edit.”  
“You hardly pay us anyways,” Hwanwoong grumbles.

“And if you keep up that attitude, you won’t get paid at all,” Minki snaps. “Do I make myself clear Hwanwoong?”

Hwanwoong opens his mouth, ready to retort.

“ _Hwanwoong_. Do I make myself clear?”

A moment. “Fine. Yes. I get it,” Hwanwoong huffs.

“Good.” Minki’s tone is final. “Meeting adjourned. I want rough drafts by Friday.”

They shuffle out of the news room, careful not to get seen. None of them are really sure what would happen if they were caught, but five people leaving a room labeled “Janitor’s Closet” would be far too fishy. Even the cool-headed Minki would struggle to keep it under control.

On the way out Gunhee bumps shoulders with Hwanwoong.

“Hey,” he starts. “Don’t take it personally, okay? Minki is hard on all of us.”

“I just don’t get why he wants us to…” Hwanwoong trails off with a shake of his head. “Whatever. It’s just…I wish he’d _listen_ to me sometime…”

Gunhee shrugs. “Minki is Minki. He’s been here the longest.”

“Yeah, because he’s a third year-”

“No, not like that, like…Minki has been in News Club for three years straight. He…he’s ran a lot of stories. _A lot._ ”

Hwanwoong sighs again. “Yeah, I mean, he…yeah. He’s Minki-hyung.”

“C’mon, let’s get to class.” Gunhee bumps their shoulders together again.

“Okay.” Hwanwoong pauses. “Thanks, Gunhee.”  
Gunhee smiles.

\----  
When lunch finally rolls around, Gunhee spends about three seconds waving goodbye to Hwanwoong before he’s off with Heeseok to the large tree that Dongsu and Namhyung had somehow claimed as their own. It’s probably Dongsu’s slit eyebrow, right? Gunhee snorts out a laugh. If only they knew…

“Ah! Hyung! Over here!”

Gunhee rolls his eyes. “I see you Sunghyuk-ah! We sit here _every day_.”

“Well not _every_ day,” Sunghyuk says. Gunhee takes a seat, Sunghyuk on his right and Heeseok on his left.

“It doesn’t count when we all had to squish under Heeseok’s tree. Heeseok shoves him lightly.

“Hey, _you all_ were the ones to barge in on _my_ tree. It was perfectly fine for just one person.”

Before Gunhee has time to retort Dongsu and Namhyung are shambling in with their matching brown paper bag lunches.

“Namhyung-hyung’s day to make lunch?” Dongmyeong asks, eyes locked on their lunches.

“How’d ya guess?” Dongsu laughs, bag already partially open. Gunhee is about to laugh along when he feels the telltale itch in his throat, a precursor to what’s sure to be a coughing fit.

“I-I’m gonna go grab water.” He stands and dusts off his knees, still working hard to suppress the coughs. One escapes but nobody seems to notice.

When he’s out of hearing range he finally gives in to a full-blown coughing fit. He doesn’t even notice when a figure comes up behind him.

“Hyung, are you okay?”

Ah, Dongmyeong.

Gunhee coughs again. It’s dry and sandy. “I-I’m fine.” A cough. “Don’t…don’t worry about me.”

Finally, his coughs pewter out. Gunhee breathes out a sigh of relief. The silence hangs over them for a few minutes, heavy and awkward.

“…when are you going to tell them?”

Gunhee forces out a laugh. “Ha…know about what?”

“Hyung,” Dongmyeong starts. His tone is so much firmer than usual. “You know what I mean.”

And Gunhee does. Of course, he does. “Dongmyeong-ah…drop it.”

“But you’re _sick_ hyun-”

“Dongmyeong. Drop it.”

Dongmyeong frowns. It’s an uncommon phenomenon.

“…you can’t keep this a secret forever.”

Gunhee wants to scowl. He wants to scold Dongmyeong. He wants to bite out “Watch me.” But he doesn’t. He just sighs and shrugs and pats Dongmyeong’s shoulder, like usual, like every other time Dongmyeong has caught him.

“…let’s go back Dongmyeong-ah.”  
“…okay.”

\----

Their return to the tree is awkward and everybody notices. The group quiets as they sit back in their normal places.

“So Gunhee, what were you saying earlier?” Namhyung asks, chopsticks poised right over a piece of beef in Dongsu’s lunch.

Gunhee’s blood runs cold. “Huh? About what?”

_Was he there? Did he see us? Maybe it’s not about the sic-_

“About you being sick or something, right?”

Gunhee clenches his right hand into a fist. His nails dig into the soft flesh of his palms.

“What? You’re sick, hyung?” Sunghyuk’s chopsticks stop millimeters away from his mouth. His eyes are wide and concerned. His nails hurt.

“Haha…I’m just a little under the weather is all.”

This seems to appease Sunghyuk, as his chopsticks continue to their awaited destination. Sunghyuk chews on his tofu slowly while Dongmyeong shifts awkwardly next to him. He doesn’t seem to notice. Gunhee is grateful.

Soon enough, the conversation takes a turn back to lighter topics and funny stories, Heeseok and his intense interest in engineering (“I almost love it as much as _singing_ ”), new relationship milestones for Sunghyuk and Dongmyeong (“We shared our very first milkshake!”), and old ones for Namhyung and Dongsu (“I’ve stolen five pairs of Dongsu’s socks. It’s a new record.”).

Gunhee laughs along with all of them, ruffling Sunghyuk’s hair as he blushes around Dongmyeong, congratulating Heeseok on finally greeting the boy who sits next to him in class, and rolling his eyes as Namhyung pouts until Dongsu gives him his last piece of beef. For a moment, it all seems fine, it feels like he can ignore the little itch at the back of his throat. But then he can’t, and he’s wheezing and coughing.

He stifles it fast, but maybe not fast enough. Dongsu is quick to help, shoving a water bottle into his hand and patting his back roughly. Dongmyeong’s eyes shift away awkwardly again, but everybody is too preoccupied with trying to help Gunhee that it goes unnoticed. From the corner of his eye, Gunhee can see Namhyung studying him, eyebrows just a tiny bit furrowed in thought. Gunhee hopes that Namhyung will just forget about it, about this. He knows he probably won’t.

“Drink up Gunhee-yah!” Dongsu commands. Gunhee smiles weakly and downs the whole bottle at Dongsu’s request.

Lunch ends a fraction more serious than usual, but Gunhee knows it’ll all blow over by tomorrow. The hairs on the back of his neck prickle. Someone is watching him. He turns ever so slightly and catches Namhyung in the act. They lock eyes and Gunhee shivers, but the moment is broken by Dongsu’s cheery smile as he interlocks his hand with Namhyung’s and all but drags him away to class. Gunhee doesn’t move until he feels the incessant tug of Heeseok taking him back to homeroom.

\----  
He’s almost in the clear at the end of the day. He gives a cursory wave to Heeseok and heads out, hands in his pockets. He’s humming just a bit when he hears the familiar sound of two voices he knows far too well.

“-nd he kept on coughing, did you notice that? Those weren’t normal coughs Dongsu-”

“He said he was feeling under the weather. And what do you _mean_ not ‘normal coughs’, huh?”

Gunhee can practically hear Namhyung bristle.

“He’s hiding something Dongsu-yah, c’mon, you can’t say you haven’t noticed-”

“No! I haven’t! There’s nothing to notice!”

“I know you have a blind spot for these friends Dongsu, but what if he’s lying?”

“Lying? Lying about what?”

There’s a few moments of silence, a cold drip of sweat slides down Gunhee’s neck, and then come the usual sighs of the third-years. The sighs of throwing in the towel.

“…listen…let’s just leave it. Let’s go home Dongsu-yah.”

“…okay. You know I trust your judgement Namhyung…but I really don’t think there’s anything here.”

More silence.

“I know. I lo-”

Gunhee escorts himself away at this point, shaking his head and gripping his backpack. He shouldn’t have even listened in. But now he knows Namhyung is suspecting something. He’ll just have to be more careful.

“I don’t want to lose these friends,” he whispers. His fists clench again. The pattern of crescent moon marks his nails make could almost be pretty. “I _can’t_ lose these friends.”

He walks home without singing at all. The tally rises. Zero to one.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gunhee just wants to keep his life together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the long hiatus.

Gunhee’s back hurts when he wakes up, just like most days. His mattress is uncomfortable, hardened from years of use. But it’s all he, all _they_ , can afford. His mother is already in the kitchen by the time he makes it out, backpack slung over his shoulder.

“Morning,” he mumbles. Her smile is soft but there are deep bags under her eyes, evidence of long work days and little sleep.

“Good morning,” she replies. She hands him a piece of toast and tries to usher him out the door. The bread is hot, almost painfully so.

He frowns. “This is the last piece of bread.” He makes an attempt to give it back. She shakes her head.

“No, you have school. Take it.”

She still looks exhausted, but her eyes are steely. Gunhee knows when he’s fighting a losing battle and he folds with a rueful smile. Money is tight. Just like usual.

“Okay.” He takes a bite and hugs him mom tight. “Love you.”  
She smiles. “Love you too.”

Outside the wind is biting but the toast is still warm. The tips of his fingers burn, but only slightly.

\----  
He’s the second one into the News Room. Hwanwoong is sitting in the corner, tapping on his phone idly. His eyes are surprisingly cold.

“Hey.”

Hwanwoong looks up. “Hey.” He makes no effort to continue. Gunhee figures the conversation, if you can even call it that, is over.

Dongmyeong is next, and then Eunki.  Both seem just as dedicated to keeping the silence. When Gunmin comes in he seems uncomfortable by the quiet, but he still doesn’t make an attempt to speak.

Minki is surprisingly the last one in the room. He looks frazzled, hair messy, eyes bloodshot. Everybody notices. Nobody talks.

“Well?” Minki starts. “Any new stories? Dongmyeong, how’s the piece on English speakers going? Gunhee, you taken photos of Samuel for his interview?”

The room is tense and Minki frowns. “Well?”

Dongmyeong coughs. “Well, I’m nearly done with my report…”  
“And I’m taking photos of Samuel today…”  
“And you’ve remembered to wear a mask, right?”

“Of course, hyung.”

“Good. Let’s work. 30 minutes like usual. Let’s go.”  
Silence falls again, and then laptops are being brought out of bags and the incessant tapping of keys being hit begins. Gunhee pulls out his camera and starts flipping through his photos. Next to him Hwanwoong shifts and grabs his mouse just a little too tight. His eyes are still firm and Gunhee wants to ask what’s wrong, but he knows not to push. The atmosphere is buzzing with energy of unpublished secrets. It’s another normal day.

\----  
In third period, right before lunch, Gunhee excuses himself to the bathroom and hacks for a good ten minutes. He’s lucky nobody comes in and catches him. When he returns to the room Hwanwoong’s gaze is upsettingly knowing. Gunhee glares. Hwanwoong’s eyes are unwavering and eventually Gunhee has to look away. Fear curls in his gut and settles itself like a rock.

Class ends and as he’s walking away with Heeseok when he’s fixed with another icy stare. Gunhee pretends not to notice but this silent conversation with Hwanwoong is far from over.

When they arrive to their tree Heeseok doesn’t hesitate to settle himself right next to Dongmyeong and Sunghyuk. Sunghyuk is leaning on Dongmyeong and Gunhee smiles. Cute.

Dongsu and Namhyung have their pinkies linked in a surprising show of soft companionship. Gunhee’s smile grows. It’s charming.

He sits and opens up his lunch bag. It’s worn, like everything else he owns, and there’s a small hole forming in the bottom left corner. He takes a quick glance at his uniform, creased and neat, but still worn, barely noticeable, but noticeable nonetheless. His backpack holds his other big purchase, his camera. It’s immaculate, kept in the best condition possible. He wishes he could give his family more but there’s been an upsetting lull in breaking news stories.

He snaps himself out of his thoughts and focuses in on Dongsu’s recent bonding with the one and only Kang Dongho.

“We were talking about how nice Teacher Mills is.”

Gunhee’s nose wrinkles in confusion. Teacher Don Mills is a lot of things, but nice isn’t exactly a descriptor he’d use.

Namhyung’s expression is just barely troubled. “Hey, you’re not getting too close to him, right?” His grip on Dongsu’s hand tightens.  
Dongsu smiles softly. “Of course not Namhyung-ah. You know you’re the only one for me.”

“Yuck.” Gunhee sticks out his tongue. “Get a room you two.”

Heeseok giggles and Dongmyeong’s grin is gummy.

“Hey, we’re fuckin’ adorable, aight?” Namhyung says with a scowl, but he breaks after a few moments, a smile spreading wide over his face. Namhyung is far too proud of his relationship with Dongsu to ever truly be mad.

Sunghyuk blinks himself awake and the rest of lunch is filled by an exciting rendition of Seonho’s never-ending pining for the school’s polished secretary, Hwang Minhyun.

“When do you even talk to him?” Dongmyeong asks. They don’t share the same homeroom, and Kahi’s rules are strict, even during lunch.

“I just do,” Sunghyuk says with a shrug.

There’s something in his voice, like he knows more than he’s letting on. Dongmyeong is studying him quietly. Gunhee holds back a dry laugh. Dongmyeong may be a sunny kid with a carefree smile, but he’s sharp. News Club isn’t made up of daydreaming amateurs after all.

Gunhee fazes out as the conversation shifts yet again, this time over to Heeseok and the newest song he’s composing. When he starts to feel the tiny beginnings of a coughing fit he digs his nails into his palms hard and holds out for the rest of lunch.

“I’ll meet you in the classroom,” he says. Heeseok’s gaze is questioning but not suspicious.

“Okay, see ya.”

He’s in the bathroom only two minutes later, coughs overtaking him. He’s hoping nobody will catch him, but it seems he can’t be lucky every time. He stills when the door opens and his eyes lock on to the figure.

“So, just under the weather, huh?” Namhyung starts.

“Y-Yeah.” Gunhee attempts a smile.

“Don’t lie to me.” Namhyung looks the angriest Gunhee has ever seen.

“…fine. I’m sick.” Gunhee drops his eyes and studies the tiled floor. The silence is thick and Gunhee gets the distinct feeling that he’s supposed to say something more. “…you were right.”

Still nothing. Gunhee looks up again. Namhyung looks torn between anger and sadness.

“Why didn’t you tell us?”

“I just…it’s complicated. You can’t tell anybody else, not even Dongsu.”

Namhyung scowls. “You know we don’t have secrets between us.”  
“Please,” he pleads. “You can’t tell him.”  
“I _have_ to.”

Gunhee gulps hard. “I’ll…I’ll leak your info…about your relationship…I have connections in News Club.” Well…it’s not exactly a lie.

“I don’t care about that shit.”

“But does Dongsu?”

Namhyung falters for a minute. “No, he…he doesn’t.”

“You don’t sound too certain.”

“I…he doesn’t care. He…”

“Can you be _sure_ , hyung?”

Namhyung takes a shaky breath. “N-No…I can’t.”

“…I’m sorry, Namhyung.”

He pats Namhyung once on the shoulder as he passes before leaving him in silence. He’s never had to blackmail a friend before. It’s a sort of chilly feeling, one that causes his stomach to churn and unpleasant goosebumps to form on his arms.

He catches Namhyung talking to Dongsu outside the school. The look Namhyung gives him is chilling to the bone. There’s a sour taste in his mouth that he can’t shake even hours later when he’s sitting alone in his room. Namhyung’s painfully hurt eyes haunt him even in his dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry that this is so sad

**Author's Note:**

> please read other fics in our [ pick me ](https://archiveofourown.org/series/816720) series!


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